Pregnancy Files 2: {The Bump Week 22}

*Check out my previous post for a chance to win $75 to PinkBlush. 

Giveaway ends tonight at Midnight!

Best Moment this week Month: Finding out that we were having another BOY! Drew and I are over the moon that Aiden is getting a brother and that we will be parents to two boys! (See our Gender Reveal Party details here).

Food cravings: Apples, Chipotle, Oreos (Up until now I haven't been craving sweets very much so now I'm in BIG trouble.)

Movement: Yes! The other night I had a sweet Starbucks drink and a fall treat and then went to the movies with a girlfriend. Baby went crazy with the sugar rush and then me being still for a full 2 hours. He was having a party in my belly. And Drew finally, finally felt him kick!

Symptoms: My back hurts a lot more this time around, probably because I'm carting around a toddler and growing a mini human at the same time. That kinda makes me sound like Superwoman, right?! I'm also feeling stretched, I wonder why? ;) And people finally know I'm pregnant just by looking at me now. More people have commented on my bump this week than throughout my entire pregnancy. I guess I have finally popped.

Nursery: Still decluttering, but I do have a nursery theme picked out and tons of ideas pinned...still no real progress though. We need to get on that.

Letter for Baby:
Dear Baby Boy,
Aiden and I got to hear your heartbeat today. It's just the best sound in the world. You are growing right on track and I love feeling you do flips in my belly. I know you can hear our voices now so in the time we have alone together I try to talk to only you.

Aiden now says your name and is getting excited about being a Big Brother. He points "you" aka the baby out in all our baby books that we have been reading and then points himself out as the Big Brother. I hope you two will be the best of friends. That is my prayer tonight.

Love,
Your Mama

Shirt from Declan+Crew

Week 16 Bumpdate

See my 22 week post with Aiden here.

You Are Not Alone {My story of loss and hope}

There are a few couples I have been praying for consistently this past year. They all have one thing in common...they want a child so badly and for one reason or another, can't make that happen right now. For any of you out there who are trying to get pregnant or have dealt with loss during a pregnancy, this post is for you. Not every pregnancy comes easily.

I really wasn't sure I would ever blog about my journey, but I'd rather share than hold it in because one thing that helped ease the pain was knowing I wasn't alone in what I was going through.

Drew and I started "trying" in July of 2013 so I was ecstatic when I took a pregnancy test that October and it was positive. I sank to my knees and cried. I was so incredibly happy. I told my husband by presenting him with a "family" of pumpkins the next day and soon our minds turned to our future as a family of 3.

After our first appointment we just had to sit back and wait a few weeks until we could hear our baby's heartbeat. I was literally counting down the days. I started making lists of potential baby names, made a secret board on Pinterest and started looking at fun ways to tell our families. Then at 8 weeks things went terribly wrong. I started bleeding and I knew immediately that was not a good sign and that something was not right. I googled possible causes and was left terrified. That was on a Friday and I continued spotting the rest of the weekend. On Monday I had to leave in the middle of the school day. I was a mess. Drew left work right away and met me at the doctor's office. We went in for an ultra sound to see if they could find a heartbeat.

Sitting there waiting for what seemed like an eternity for the nurse to tell you something, anything was painful. Then the nurse said aloud the dreaded words "I need to go get the doctor now." Sitting next to your husband at your first ultra sound should be thrilling, but for us it was terrifying. From the moment the nurse said those words I just knew in my heart that things were not going to go the way we had been dreaming.

The doctor came in and told us that there was no heartbeat. That the gestational sac where the embryo develops was empty. It was anembryonic pregnancy, which I found out more about later. She said it was nothing that I had done and then everything else blurred into the background. I felt so incredibly empty on so many levels after hearing those words. Everything I had been planning in my head about our baby was stripped away from me in one instant. 

The next few weeks were some of the hardest days I have ever experienced. My mind wanted to dwell on questions like  Is something wrong with me? And Will this happen to me again? But I knew I couldn't stay in that place. We told our families what had happened and love was poured out on me in so many ways that week. I am so thankful to be surrounded with such an amazing family and a husband who would do anything to see me smile. Then this is what I read in my daily devotional as I was desperately seeking comfort.

November 19th, 2013 (Jesus Calling)

Leave outcomes up to me. Follow Me wherever I lead without worrying about how it will all turn out...You already know the ultimate destination of your journey: your entrance into heaven. So keep your focus on the path just before you, leaving outcomes up to Me.

The reference verse was Psalms 27:13-14, which again directly spoke to my heart:
"Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord."

Looking back on my story, this is a part of my journey, a part of who I am today. Would I choose to go through it again? Probably not. But did it make me a stronger person. Yes.

If you are going through a hard time (pregnancy related or not) I would recommend reading the books below to help you gain perspective. Regardless of what you are going through God loves you and hates seeing you hurting and whether or not you want to hear it you are blessed, but we live in a broken world and we aren't promised a life without trials.  God loves you more than you can imagine. He is always faithful even if things don't turn out the way we plan.

Bittersweet by Shauna Niequist
(Thank you Katie for recommending this one to me. I am forever thankful.)
One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp
Draw the Circle by Mark Batterson

The October after my miscarriage (almost exactly a year later) my sweet Aiden was born. My pregnancy with Aiden was amazing. At times I was nervous and extremely scared, but I could only trust and wait. I was so thankful for every kick, every hiccup, every doctor's appointment where I got a good report. Aiden has been a bright light in our lives in a dark time. His birth could not have come at a more perfect time.

God knows what He is doing. Leave the outcomes up to Him.

I also found so much comfort in reading many of your stories. If any of you need to share a story that is on your heart I am here to talk to you or pray for you. You are not alone in this.

There is always hope.

What to do when you are...OVERDUE

Today I'm officially 41 weeks and 1 day. I am OVERDUE. 

When you find out your due date that date is forever etched in your mind. You see it as an expiration date on food at the grocery store and you get excited, you turn to that week in your planner and you can't believe it's here...then it comes and goes and you are still pregnant. I can't tell you how badly I am aching to meet Aiden, so I have had to distract myself this last week. Here are some things you can do while you wait on your baby to come: (If you are one of us mamas that has to do that!)

-Make sure all your baby's clothes, blankets, burp clothes, etc. are washed, folded and organized

-Wash bottles

-Clean your house from top to bottom or if you don't feel up to it have your Mom or Mother in law do it!

-Keep working. I have been fortunate enough to continue feeling good well into 41 weeks so I have kept working and it helps A LOT!

-If you are planning on having music on while you are in labor, why not make a delivery play list? I've been listening to mine all week.

-Go on walks. I have walked at least 2 miles every day since Aiden's due date. It helps that the weather has been amazing.

-Pack your hospital bag and load it in the car. Make sure your husband packs one too!

-Make some freezer meals. If this is something you just haven't had time for, what are you waiting for?

-Eat spicy foods! Use this as an excuse to not make dinner and go get something yummy. I'm thinking I need to go back to Bonefish Grill to try a second helping of Bang Bang Shrimp...just in case.

-Since everyone and their uncle will be calling or texting you to see where in the heck this baby is, use this time to catch up with people because you probably won't have time once baby comes

-Pick up a good book (that is unrelated to baby stuff) and read it to distract yourself! I finished the 5th Harry Potter and am now half way through the 6th. 

-If you haven't found a Pediatrician yet, use this time to do some research. They will want to know at the hospital who you have chosen. 

-Prepare for any upcoming events you might not have time for. Halloween is this Friday so we went ahead and bought all our Halloween candy, put it in bowls and put up some decorations so we wouldn't be scrambling if Aiden decides to come close to then. My husband would be thrilled if Aiden was a Halloween baby by the way.

-Take naps. At first I was annoyed with people telling me to rest up while I still can, but I know it's true. The last week has been very restful. I've taken more naps this week than I did my entire pregnancy combined. 

-Spend time praying for your baby and your upcoming delivery. I've had some really good chats with God this week. Some of them have ended in tears, but most of them have left me reassured. God's timing is perfect in every way and although I'm anxious it is much easier to trust Him. He's got this.

-Go out to eat with your husband. This is another thing that won't be happening as often for a while plus you don't have to cook.

-Plan a fun day date and make it happen. Don't just sit around waiting for baby. Trust me on this.

-Don't compare yourself with other new Moms...in the last week, 3 of my friends (all due after me), have had their babies and one is in labor right now. Your baby will come at the perfect time. Just keep telling yourself that.

I am convinced now that no theory for bringing on labor works, your baby will come when they are ready and when God is finished with them. Trust me...I've tried them ALL minus White Castle. I'm sorry, but I just could not do it. Any other suggestions from you mamas out there that had to wait on your little ones to arrive?

Pregnancy Files {The Bump Week 40!}

 {Sorry for two bump posts in a row, but I'm kind of over them and wanted to hit publish.}

So I did it. I somehow managed to take a bump picture every week. They may not have all been taken with a quality camera, the last few weeks I could only manage fuzzy iPhone pictures, but hey, it's documented. Thanks to all of you who have stuck around to read my pregnancy posts and make sweet comments along the way. I can't wait to be able to share pictures of Aiden with you, but he has yet to make his debut! I'm praying contractions start soon...like while I'm typing this post. Who prays for contractions? Haha.

Best moment this week: So many people have told me that they went into labor after eating Bang Bang shrimp at Bonefish Grill. I love Bang Bang Shrimp so didn't need any other reason than possibly bringing on labor to go and give this theory a try. Our waiter asked me when I was due and I said casually, "today." He couldn't believe it and was so incredibly sweet. He ended up treating us to dessert and comped it "due date."

Food cravings: Anything with sugar...Nutella by the spoonful has been doing it for me lately.

Movement: He has been moving around a ton. The doctor's say he is about 6 pounds 12 ounces right now and I am guessing his living quarters are getting a little cramped.

Symptoms: Definitely crampy and achy. I love fall, but putting on boots has been a real challenge. Drew has been helping me, but when he's not around it feels like every time I pull on a boot I'm going to go into labor. I would actually welcome that at this point...

Nursery: A little sneak peek above. It's all finished minus hanging a few things on the walls. I have a nursery tour post drafted in my drafts folder...someday it will make it out there.

Prayer for Baby:
Dear Aiden,
There have been a few perks to you not being born on your actual due date. 1.) Your Dad and I have gotten a few extra date nights in. One included free dessert, 2.) I'm now on page 700 of the 5th Harry Potter book, 3.) I feel especially loved because someone is constantly calling or texting to check on me and see if you have entered the world yet. While it is nice to still feel you moving around inside me I really, really want to see your little face. Please come soon. Tonight would be nice.
Love,
Your Mama

Dear Lord,
This week has been tough on me. More than I thought it would be. I've been super emotional in our chats together, but know you have this all under control. I know you know how badly I want to meet Aiden, but I also trust you completely. Thank you for allowing songs to come on that you know I need to hear at just the right moment. My song of the moment..."I surrender all." I surrender to you my anxiousness, I surrender to you my body and little Aiden. Thank you for taking care of us and meeting me where I am. Amen.

Psalm 37:7
"Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him."

          Week 14 Bumpdate                          Week 15 Bumpdate                          Week 16 Bumpdate 

         Week 17 Bumpdate                          Week 18 Bumpdate                          Week 19 Bumpdate 

    Week 20 Bumpdate                          Week 21 Bumpdate                          Week 22 Bumpdate 

    Week 23 Bumpdate                          Week 24 Bumpdate                          Week 25 Bumpdate

    Week 26 Bumpdate                          Week 27 Bumpdate                          Week 28 Bumpdate

    Week 29 Bumpdate                          Week 30 Bumpdate                          Week 31 Bumpdate

Week 32 Bumpdate                          Week 33 Bumpdate                          Week 34 Bumpdate

Week 35 Bumpdate                          Week 36 Bumpdate                          Week 37 Bumpdate

Week 38 Bumpdate                          Week 39 Bumpdate                          Week 40 Bumpdate

Pregnancy Files {The Bump Week 39}

 {Posting a week behind as most of you know since my due date was the 19th!}

Best moment this week: The weather this week has been gorgeous so I've gotten quite a few nice walks in at the park by our house. I want the leaves to hang on just a little longer. This season has gone by way too fast.

Food cravings: Still Chipotle. I thought yesterday was going to be my last Chipotle run before Aiden, but I will probably have it again today. Just being honest. Haha.

Movement: I have the alien belly. He is constantly morphing around in there. When I set anything on my stomach he makes sure to kick it off immediately. 

Symptoms: My back hurts. A LOT.

Nursery: Working on my nursery tour post...hopefully I'll post it next week.

Prayer for Baby:
Dear Aiden,
This week has been hard for me because all I want to do is meet you. I've had to distract myself with things like laundry, fall baking and episode upon episode of Gilmore Girls on Netflix. I know everyone says rest up and enjoy this time and I've heard you can't stay pregnant forever multiple times, but I just want to hold you. Are you helping me practice patience? I'm trying very hard to be patient.
Love,
Your Mama

Dear Lord,
You know my heart. You know what I'm feeling before I even speak it. Calm my heart and help prepare my body and my mind for giving birth to this precious boy. Amen.

Psalm 40:8 "I desire to do your will, my God; your law is within my heart."

          Week 14 Bumpdate                          Week 15 Bumpdate                          Week 16 Bumpdate 

         Week 17 Bumpdate                          Week 18 Bumpdate                          Week 19 Bumpdate 

    Week 20 Bumpdate                          Week 21 Bumpdate                          Week 22 Bumpdate 

    Week 23 Bumpdate                          Week 24 Bumpdate                          Week 25 Bumpdate

    Week 26 Bumpdate                          Week 27 Bumpdate                          Week 28 Bumpdate

    Week 29 Bumpdate                          Week 30 Bumpdate                          Week 31 Bumpdate

Week 32 Bumpdate                          Week 33 Bumpdate                          Week 34 Bumpdate

Week 35 Bumpdate                          Week 36 Bumpdate                          Week 37 Bumpdate

Pregnancy Files {The Bump Week 38}

A blurry doctor's office selfie because I was too tired to manage anything else this week plus I blame the rain.

Best moment this week: Having only been at my new job for 4 months I don't qualify for the Family Medical leave act and I don't have a ton of paid time to take off for my maternity leave, which I wasn't too worried about because I love my job so much, but obviously it was something Drew and I had to consider since we are adding more costs with a baby. Well some of my co-workers went in and donated some of their own personal time for me out of the kindness of their hearts. I now have 2 more paid weeks of time off and couldn't be more thankful. It honestly makes me tear up thinking about the generosity of people I've known for such a short time.

Food cravings: Thanks to Anne I've been craving chocolate milkshakes. :)

Movement: He's been moving around and whenever my stomach gets tight I think...am I going to start contracting now? Is he coming soon? I hope so! Never in my life have I been more excited to endure pain. Is that weird that I'm not nervous about labor?

Symptoms: My back still hurts and my belly button can't decide if it wants to stay in or pop out. It's a little late in the game for it to be popping out right?

Nursery: I finally took some pictures of the nursery now I just have to make time to upload them and actually do a  blog post.

Prayer for Baby:
Dear Aiden,
I am so anxious for you to get here I can't even stand it. Your car seat is installed, inspected by the fire department and waiting for you. I so badly want to hold you and just look at you. Your Dad and I can't wait to meet you!!!! Please come soon.
Love,
Your Mama

Dear Lord,
I have never anticipated something so much in my life. Everyday I wake up and think, is today the day I get to meet my son? I know you know when he is coming and it's already planned perfectly so help me to soak up these last few hours/days/weeks of having Aiden kicking around inside me. Amen

Ecclesiastes 3:1
"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens."

          Week 14 Bumpdate                          Week 15 Bumpdate                          Week 16 Bumpdate 

         Week 17 Bumpdate                          Week 18 Bumpdate                          Week 19 Bumpdate 

    Week 20 Bumpdate                          Week 21 Bumpdate                          Week 22 Bumpdate 

    Week 23 Bumpdate                          Week 24 Bumpdate                          Week 25 Bumpdate

    Week 26 Bumpdate                          Week 27 Bumpdate                          Week 28 Bumpdate

    Week 29 Bumpdate                          Week 30 Bumpdate                          Week 31 Bumpdate

Week 32 Bumpdate                          Week 33 Bumpdate                          Week 34 Bumpdate

Week 35 Bumpdate                          Week 36 Bumpdate                          Week 37 Bumpdate

Pregnancy Files {The Bump Week 37}

Best moment this week: The best moment of the week was being part of Carly and Josh's wedding day. I was a very pregnant bridesmaid and was just so glad not to go into labor on or before their big day. Drew officiated the wedding and was a groomsman so we were kind of important to their day and I would not have wanted to miss it! I will post pictures this week.

Food cravings: Nothing new. Chipotle still tastes good and I really don't think it will ever get old.

Movement: Still moving around in there, but he is head down and in the ready position, which is just crazy!

Symptoms: Super crampy and my back hurts. My lower abs are just sore, which I've read means he's starting to descend. AH!

Nursery: I finally decided it was time to set out the rug and I love how it looks. Our friend Alex came over and installed a light fixture and fan so I'm super pumped to have more light in Aiden's room! 

Prayer for Baby:
Dear Aiden,
This week your Aunt Carly and Uncle Josh got married. It was a beautiful day! Thank you for deciding to stay put in my belly until after their wedding. During the reception the DJ played the song "Wobble, Baby" just for me and since I hate missing out on anything even while being 9 months pregnant with you I danced the night away and had the best time. You are one lucky little fella to be joining this family. There is so much love to be shared. You are allowed to come any time now although your Aunt Carly would really like for you to wait until she is back from her honeymoon.
Love,
Your Mama

Dear Lord,
Thank you for family. Thank you for love. Thank you that I am part of a family who puts others above themselves. I am so thankful that Aiden will have such wonderful people in his life to love him the way he is meant to be loved. Amen. 

1 Corinthians 13:13
"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."

          Week 14 Bumpdate                          Week 15 Bumpdate                          Week 16 Bumpdate 

         Week 17 Bumpdate                          Week 18 Bumpdate                          Week 19 Bumpdate 

    Week 20 Bumpdate                          Week 21 Bumpdate                          Week 22 Bumpdate 

    Week 23 Bumpdate                          Week 24 Bumpdate                          Week 25 Bumpdate

    Week 26 Bumpdate                          Week 27 Bumpdate                          Week 28 Bumpdate

    Week 29 Bumpdate                          Week 30 Bumpdate                          Week 31 Bumpdate

Week 32 Bumpdate                          Week 33 Bumpdate                          Week 34 Bumpdate

Week 35 Bumpdate                          Week 36 Bumpdate                          Week 37 Bumpdate